Activities on Interpersonal Communication and Building Vocabulary

 Activities on Interpersonal Communication and Building Vocabulary

Interpersonal communication can be defined as the process by which people exchange

information, feeling and meaning through both verbal- and non verbal messages. It is a kind of

face to face conversation that takes place between strangers or known individuals, in any context

or situation. It is not just about what is actually said, the language used, but also focuses on how

it is said. The non-verbal messages sent through the tone of voice, facial expressions, gestures

and body language also play an important role.

Conversation is a form of interactive, spontaneous communication between two or more people.

It is an important aspect in spoken communication. The development of conversational skills and

etiquette is an important part of socialization. The development of conversational skills in

English among engineering students is the need of the hour.

Kinesics or Role of Body Language in Communication: Body language plays an important

role in communication. Most often it sends signals stronger than words. The sub conscious mind

controls the body movements, so listeners can easily understand if there is a difference in what

you are saying and thinking. Hence, it is very important that your words and body language

complement each other. Body language comprises of the gestures and movements we make of

the different parts of our body when communicating with people. Facial expression and eye

movements are very important while conveying your feelings. A smile on the face reflects

confidence. Right body posture enables you to control your voice easily. Your body weight

should be balanced on the feet to have right and correct posture. Observe your body language

when you are happy and confident. You will notice that your body is balanced and you take full

breath at easy and your body moves synchronously with your voice.

Why body language:-

 Body language can instantaneously help to assess the interest of people

 It is a personal way of expressing emotions when words don’t or can’t help

 It makes communication interesting

Positive body gestures

Positive body gestures enhance confidence and security. They are signs of active participation

and leave a good impression. Positive gestures include:-

 Walking upright

 Shaking hands confidently

 Having a pleasant face.

 Nodding head is a positive gesture

 A steady eye contact

Negative body gestures

Negative gestures symbolize insecurity and restlessness. Such gestures show lack of confidence.

Such gestures should be avoided in interviews or meetings.

 Being up tied

 Biting nails

 Getting distracted

 Faking a smile

 Looking at something else while talking instead of the speaker

 Proper etiquettes should be followed.

Points to remember:-

 Never be stiff while making movements.

 Avoid body language that may be misunderstood or look unprofessional. E.g. Winking.

 A consistent eye contact is a positive sign and must be used.

 Avoid fiddling with things around. It may distract the attention.

 Each body part movement signifies something and helps in interpreting. E.g. Standing

with hands on hips signifies aggressions, nodding signifies agreement and active

listening, biting nails signifies nervousness.

 Unlike emails, body language does not give time to think. Hence they must be used

appropriately.

How to start a conversation:

Starting a conversation to know someone, or breaking tongue-tied silence can be very stressful.

However, it is not difficult. The following guidelines can be used to start a conversation, when

there is nothing to talk about.

 Comment on the location or occasion: Look around to see if there is anything worth

pointing out. For instance, “I enjoy this view!” “Such incredible food!” etc.

 Ask an open-ended question: Open ended questions facilitate to start the conversation

and continue the conversation with ease. Open ended questions generally begin with

question words like who, when, what, why, where and how. For example, “What sort of

books do you like?” Which season do you prefer the most etc.

 Learn how to combine general remarks with open-ended questions: Sometimes either

one of these may be awkward or seem to be out of place or context on its own. In such

situations, combine general remarks with open ended questions for maximum effect. For

example, “That’s a beautiful hand bag, where did you get it?” This combination of

general remarks with open ended question allows the owner of the hand bag to talk about

the day she went for shopping and her experiences.

 Enquire about their pets: Talking about animals can create a common ground to speak

about when there is absolutely nothing to talk in common. Don’t talk about your pet, as it

may be annoying to some people. Instead, asking about their pets is a great way to allow

people to open up and talk with less effort.

 Acquire adequate knowledge on current events: Updating one’s knowledge on current

affairs is a good way to start a conversation or continue the conversation. When you are

ready to start a conversation, you can say something like, “Did you read the news about

earthquake in Nepal?”

 Make use of previous discussions: If the person is a known individual, recollect the list

of topics already discussed and continue with one of them. For example, children, or

projects or bad news that he/she shared. This gives a topic to talk about, and also makes

them understand that you care about them.

 Pose questions that are easy to answer: Some questions are hard to answer and make

the person think sometimes, “Do I really have to answer this question?” Many people

prefer easy questions to hard questions. For instance, “What are your plans for today?”,

“How do you feel working in summer?”etc.

 Understand their feelings: Don’t ask questions that invade their personal space. Some

people experience discomfort in discussing topics such as weight, or lack of possessing a

degree or qualification etc. Be thoughtful and avoid starting a conversation on such topics

even with strangers.

 Wash off your fears: When you feel that you are not able to participate in conversation,

with another person, it may be because you started telling yourself a few negative things

like you are boring, intruding or wasting their time. This can leave you embarrassed and

tongue-tied. Feeling self-conscious during conversation is not unusual and also not

productive.

Tips for an effective conversation:

 Introduce yourself, if you don’t know the person. Look approachable, tell the person your

name and offer a firm hand shake and smile.

 Keep the conversation light and simple, especially if you are still getting to know each

one better.

 Use small talk to establish relationship and affinity. Small talk can be started on topics

like, the purchase of new car, vacation plans, a newly planted garden etc.

 Talking about weather is a cliché, but if there is something unusual about the weather, it

can be a great topic for conversation.

 Follow your partner’s cue for a smooth conversation.

 Employ active listening strategies to know what they are saying and to summarize their

feelings.

 Ask and answer the questions as part of conversation. Ensure that they get adequate time

to talk.

 Tell the other person’s name as a sign of respect and to make them feel comfortable. It

makes the conversation real and intimate.

 Utilize acknowledgement cues like nodding, giving short but encouraging statements like

“Is that true?”, “Is that so?” That’s quite interesting or amazing!”

 Keep your body language open and amicable. Nod while agreeing; make eye contact,

lean forward. This will make them feel more comfortable and makes the conversation

more natural.

 Keep a sensible bubble of personal space if the person you're talking to is a stranger or

someone that you don't know well.

 Remain engaged in the conversation.

 Respond naturally. Laugh for a funny comment or joke. Don’t force laughter.

 Practice getting conversations started. It is little difficult in the beginning, but becomes

easy with practice.

 Follow your partner’s lead: If your conversational partner appears to listen interestingly,

continue. If he or she looks at a clock or wrist watch, or searches for an escape strategy,

then you have been going on for too long. It is important to observe and following your

partner’s cues to make the conversation pleasant. This may be a hard skill to learn, but

can be practiced.

 Use sensory words: Words like ‘imagine’, ‘feel’, ‘tell’ etc. encourage the other person to

paint an imaginary and descriptive picture as part of the conversation. This will make

the conversation engaging and will also leave an impact on the other person.

For example “How do you feel about the new government?”

 Maintain the equilibrium: As the person who started the conversation, the responsibility

to continue the conversation and maintaining its momentum rests on you. If the other

person listens to actively and pose open questions back for you, take them as their cues

and keep them engaged in conversation by asking them open questions.

 Don’t be afraid of pauses: Pauses can be looked at as opportunities to change the topics,

re-energize the conversation. Letting a pause for a long time is the only time that you

should think or worry about silence in a conversation. As long as you can move naturally

to the next subject or topic, its fine and should not feel stressed.

 Don’t make your partner feel uncomfortable: Answer respectfully to someone who

remains uncomfortable in your presence. If your conversational partner appears

uninterested or withdrawn in conversing or sharing information with you, don’t irritate

too much and don’t ask too many questions.

 Give yourself an out: Entering into a conversation means that you can talk briefly with

your friends. This will not make your partner feel trapped or obligated, and also gives

you an opportunity to conclude, when necessary.

Role-Plays: Role playing is defined as pretending to be someone else or pretending to be in a

specific situation that you are not actually in at the time. An example of role playing is when you

pretend that your friend is your boss and you have a practice conversation in which you ask for a

salary hike.

In day to day life, we require information about many things. We have to ask for information

about various things and also give information to different people about different things.

Expressions utilized differ from situation to situation. For instance, the expressions used in

asking for information is different from complaining. Thus, the students should know the

differences and master them to be proficient in using the language. Few expressions that are

generally used during request are given below for better understanding as an example.

Making Requests:

 Could you possibly give me a glass of water?

 Do you think you could give me a glass of water?

 I wonder if you could give me a glass of water.

 Would you mind giving me a glass of water?

 I would be grateful if you could give me a glass of water?

 I would appreciate if you could give me a glass of water?

Helping students or trainers to understand human behavior is one of the most common problems

faced by teachers and trainers. Increasingly tutors are using experiential methods to give

individuals practice at dealing with real life problems, and many of these methods involve the

use of role-play. If it is used well, role-play can vastly enhance the learning experience, but often

the full potential of the role-play is diminished as it is ineffectively, or inappropriately, applied.

Discussion Questions:

1. Imagine that you are travelling in a train and would like to converse with the traveler

sitting opposite to you. How will you start a conversation?

2. You are the director of a company and decided to select the best manager of the year.

Talk to your colleagues on the criteria you have decided upon to select.

3. Mrs. Mary is baking cakes when her daughter Linda came home from school. Write an

imaginary conversation between Mary and Linda.

4. You and your friend have decided to attend a musical concert in the city. Write a few

lines of your conversation about the concert you have planned to attend.

5. You happened to meet your old friend in a super market. Write the dialogues between

you and your friend.

6. Browse and find out various formal expressions used in situations like complaining,

apologizing, giving and asking for information.